Monday, November 11, 2013

In Which I Get a Little Church-y

Hey guys. It's been a bit since I've done a real blog post, but to be honest it's because I haven't wanted to show how angry/sad/frustrated I've been. My heart has been hurting a lot with things people have said and done. It's interesting because I've been feeling so down, and as I've read some of my favorite blogs lately, I've noticed that there are many other women feeling the same or similar things as me. I guess you have to lose faith in humanity to have it restored, right?

I've experienced lots of cruelty recently. The kind of cruelty I haven't experienced since high school. The kind where I'm sitting in a booth at Zupas sobbing and trying to make sure the people that hurt me don't see me succumbing to their incredible unkindness. One thing I've learned is that once someone hurts you, you tend to notice other people, organizations, and companies (I'm looking at you, Lululemon) being rude or inconsiderate left and right. As a result, I'm feeling a bit downtrodden and cold toward people in general at the moment.

That being said, I'm excited for the holidays. Whenever I'm feeling like people are mostly bad, I think about the holidays. Christmas music starts playing, hot chocolate comes in red cups, people smile more, and there is generally more charity to be found. For me, Christmas can't come soon enough. It's hard to be sad when you're decorating Christmas trees, buying gifts for others, and binge-watching Love Actually.

So, here's where things start looking up. In the car the other night when I was feeling particularly down, Karl told me about an experience that had been related to him by his old bishop. One time when he was out to dinner, his bishop was receiving terrible service. The waitress ignored him and his wife, their food was cold, etc. At the end of the meal, he was so frustrated that he was trying to think of things to do to get back at the waitress (i.e. not leave a tip, call and complain, call her out to her face), when he heard, "She is a child of God" whispered to him. Immediately any feelings of anger dissapated with that knowledge and he decided to give the waitress the benefit of the doubt. Who knows what's going on in other people's lives, right? The fact of the matter is, we are all children of God.

This last Sunday, Karl and I sat down at church to find out that it was the Primary Program. For those of you who don't know, in my church the Primary consists of all the kids between 3 and 11. On rare occasions, these kids get of in front of the entire congregation to sing songs and read little bits of scripture or tell personal experiences. It's one of the most adorable things you'll ever see, I highly recommend coming to one, even if you're not LDS. Anyway, on Sunday, each child went up to the microphone and said his or her name, something they consider themselves to be (scientist, artist, cowboy(!) etc.), and each one followed that with, "I am a child of God." 

It hit me again while I was watching these sweet little kids I've grown to love. They know they are children of God and they know others are children of God. So why do we, as adults, forget this so often? I'm constantly putting myself down. I'm so quick to judge others and often too quick to get angry or impatient with just about everyone. I know I'm not alone in this. I think all of us need to keep this fact in the forefront of our minds at all times: we are all children of God and none of us deserves to feel less or to make others feel less than that.

This holiday season, when you begin to feel angry at the line-cutters at Target, or want to yell at the people walking soooo slowly in front of you at the mall (this kills me), or even if someone says something explicitly offensive to you, try to remember that we're all children of God and move along gracefully.

In the mean time, I'll try to dispose of the hypothetical fantasy in which I "accidentally" pour soda all over those girls at Zupas. I guess they're daughters of God too… :)

Overall, be kind, be good, be happy. This applies to others as well as yourself. Have a great week, friends and as always, thanks for reading.


Valerie said...

I don't know what those girls said or who they are, but they obviously need your lesson. You are loved by many, and you should never forget that. By upsetting you, those girls got exactly what they wanted. Don't give them the satisfaction. Just think that you are obviously more loved than they are. If you weren't, they wouldn't feel the need to "bring you down a notch."

Nicole said...

I'm sorry that you've been hurt so much recently. I can definitely empathize with the comments-from-other-people-stinging-so-much. Life is hard enough without adding in people who are cruel to us. Sending love from Nebraska.

Danielle Warren said...

I think that you are outstanding & beautiful in so many ways & I haven't even met you! This post, as sad as it is knowing exactly how you feel, is beautiful. I hope that as the season goes on, you will feel more & more better!


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