Guest Blogger: Savvy Pants

Hello lovelies! While I'm away having a ball in New York City, I asked my friend Savvy Pants to entertain you all. I've known Savvy Pants pretty much the entire time I've know Karl (she's bffs with his sister, Lara). Savvy Pants is a rockstar. She dropped everything and moved from Utah to NYC- Something I understand very well, isn't afraid to be herself, and has a blog that is way too hilarious and entertaining to handle. I highly suggest you check her and her blog out. You won't be sorry. So without further adieu, here she is!

Beauty Sleep is No Joke

I want to lament my lack of sleep, but I know that anyone with children has it far worse than me.
Whereas I wake up with work-induced panic and struggle to go back to sleep because of worry,
parents wake up with crying-induced disturbances and struggle to go back to sleep because of the
human they are forced to care for. With that perspective in mind, I will not complain (although
I’d like to) I will just share my thoughts about beauty sleep.

Think back to a vacation you went on that was relaxing and restful. You know what; take a
minute to look back at the pictures.

Go ahead. I’ll wait…

Don’t you look amazing?

A year ago my friend and I took our moms on a cruise. Sure, I got too sunburned to function and
we had to have a Naked Aloe Vera Party, but besides that I looked amazing. My face was clear,
my hair was shiny, I was smiling, and best of all, no baggy saggy eyes! You know why? I slept
like 12 hours a day (sometimes in direct sunlight on the ocean, not my brightest moment)

Lately I’m averaging about 4-5 hours a night. Not bad, I know many have it far worse, but it’s
taking a toll. I not only don’t feel on top of my game but I’m starting to look a bit haggard. You
know the lady on the bus (you know the one, doesn’t matter which bus, she’s on it) with the
frizzy hair, dark, sagging circles under her eyes and lipstick on her teeth? I’m starting to look
like her.

I have a wonderful coworker (we’ll call her Pamela) who always speaks her mind. She tells
everyone what she thinks directly, without hesitation or apology. One time we were listening as
a fellow coworker told a story of the romantic such and such her husband had just done when
Pamela pipes in, “Didn’t he cheat on you last year?” Awkward… So it was no surprise when two
days ago she said to me,

“Sweetie, you look like you’ve been run ragged. Seriously, you look worse than my weave.”

Best. Insult. Ever.

After that I took a minute to evaluate the care that goes in to making oneself look happy and
healthy. We all put on make-up, fluff up our hair and wear our spiffiest clothes, but damn, you
have to catch your Zs as well! This isn’t strictly a female issue either, in fact, I think that beauty
sleep in more important for men. They don’t have the luxury of hiding behind makeup and pretty
hair.

Don’t fret; I’ve come up with some trusty methods to make up for my inability to sleep at night.

1) Meeting Fakeout: Devise a meeting that is a) off site and b) not with anyone that can be
verified and then use that hour to take a nap. My personal follow up favorite is to come
back to work looking annoyed and complain that the person didn’t show up.

2) Phone Call Fakeout: Get an emergency phone call from your mom/sister/child and sound
upset and concerned. Excuse yourself and go take a nap. When you return, look like
you’ve just been crying and tell them you don’t want to talk about it.

3) Running an Errand Fakeout: Yesterday I walked past a company van, when I looked
inside I saw “Charlie” taking a nap in the driver’s seat. He wasn’t MY employee so I
could only respect his ballsy decision. Not even 10 minutes later his boss asked me if I
had seen Charlie. Apparently he had run to the hardware store a half an hour before and
hadn’t returned. I couldn’t rat him out, I live in New York, snitches get stitches.

4) Going to Lunch Fakeout: Go to lunch, take a nap instead. This really only affects you, but
sometimes you need it.

So far these are all situations in which you have to fake someone out to get away with your
napping adventures. But some people are above these methods. If you feel you have the G
Status to pull off my next option, do it!

5) Be a G: I worked with this lady who would take a nap at her desk every day. She got her
work done and was a good employee, but every day she would take a nap at her desk
without apology. G.

*Note: I apologize for not having any tips for the parents. I have admitted that they have it
worse than me yet I failed to offer any support. All I can say is that I don’t have any kids… for a
reason… I would probably end up putting them in a closet for an hour so that I could take a nap.
But hey, you can try that if you’d like.*

I hope some of these tips come in handy for you. I employ one of these strategies at least twice a
week. Pamela has made it very clear that I need to get my beauty sleep. My job has already taken
my sanity. If it takes my beauty I’ll have nothing left.

See? Isn't she great?! Now head over and follow her blog. You know you want to. http://savvy-pants.blogspot.com/.