I've discovered recently that a crucial thing that we all must eventually learn is knowing when to walk away. Whether it's walking away from a significant other, a way of life, a mindset, or a hobby, knowing when something has run it's course is imperative to growing. I've been evaluating my life a lot lately, and I think I've been holding onto too many trivial things. Life is about happiness, about knowledge, about fulfillment. I needed to let go of the things that were keeping me from finding my true self, or who I want to become. Despite wanting to go on a mission, I couldn't help but have the desire to go on dates and be in a relationship. I just couldn't let that go, and although it's getting better, I'm still having a hard time moving past that. Nobody wants to be lonely, and that definitely includes me. I have to walk away from that mindset. I'm preparing for my mission. I need to focus on myself, and improving my spirituality, not on finding a man.
I'm also starting to realize that everyone has their own talents. Just because mine aren't as visible or highly praised as the talents of others doesn't make them any less important. I have my talents for a reason. I have the gift of comforting others, giving good advice, balancing things, intelligence, and being kind to others. I'm not spouting these talents to be narcissistic or self-praising. I'm writing these beacause I have really been struggling with finding my own talents and comparing myself to others. But, as it turns out, all of these talents that I've obtained were pointed out to me by those around me. It took others telling me me talents to realize how many gifts I've been given. In addition, I also know I need to nourish my talents and let them grow and develop as I do. That being said, I also know that there are talents that I want, but I just will never have. I've been trying to learn the piano, and part of discovering myself, is discovering what I'm just not good at. I have come to the knowlege that I'm defintely not a musically inclined person. It just doesn't come naturally for me.
I am extraordinary. I love myself and who I've become. I see little wierd quirks in my personality (the random noises I make, awkwardly pointing at people, belting it in the car, etc.) and I know whoever I do end up with, will love these things in me, and will most likely be just as wierd as me.
It's easy to get depressed, but it's important to know when to walk away from those feelings. "Life is good. Everyone just overreacts. Even me." Enjoying the journey is the best thing we can do. I have the gospel in my life. As long as I have that and am living my life worthily, there is no reason to feel dejected or alone. Life is beautiful, and so am I.